Saturday, February 13, 2016

Bigfoot Attacks! How Do You Defend Yourself?


So you're walking along the hiking trail in your favorite National Park, when out of nowhere a bigfoot comes crashing through the bushes! What do you do? How do you defend yourself from such a powerful beast? Ok, unlikely that you're going to be attacked by a bigfoot, but there are other wild animals out there you do have to worry about while squatching.

We all know that Squatchin can take you into the woods; sometimes really deep into the woods. Into areas where not only Sasquatch live, but wild animals such as bears and mountain lions call home.

Are You Prepared To Defend Yourself Against A Wild Animal Attack?

To date we have only speculation, as far as Bigfoot on human attacks go. But we do know that mountain lions (cougars) and bears will, at times, attack humans.

Now, many people will say that a gun is your best choice of defense against a big animal. And sometimes that may very well be the case; but what kind of caliber would you need to take down a full-grown grizzly? A gun could be as effective as an Air Horn in some cases. Now, if you are going to take a gun into the field, you should be sure to check your local ordinances so that you know the legal implications of being armed in your area.

Another tactic that has been used against nosey bears is simply to yell and wave your hands above your head, to appear dominate to the bear. Try not to show fear.

As I prepare myself for Squatchin' season... all these things come to mind...

For the full article, click here. 

45 comments:

  1. The best way to avoid bigfoot attack is by staying at home posting snarky comments on bigfoot blog sites.

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    Replies
    1. It's probably best to guard yourself against wild animals that actually exist rather than making believe you're safeguarding against a non-existent myth.

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    2. PURE SELF-KNOWLEDGE ... congratulations

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    3. ^

      foreskin pulled back tight ?

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    4. 4:09... Plenty of missing people, remember... And myths don't leave tracks & hairs.

      Don't be too scared now!

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    5. Myths don't leave tracks and hairs, but bears do. And hypothermia accounts for more people than even bears.

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    6. Unfortunately, bears don't leave primate species traits, nor do they sequence for human DNA once tested. The only real myth here is your alleged healthy reasons for being here.

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    7. sometimes you thinking you seeing BIGFOOT but its really a DOGMAN and DOGMAN will attack humans and Bigfoot not so much

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    8. What primate species traits are you talking about? And only humans account for human DNA, usually through contamination due to poor sampling methods.

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    9. Argh, you know I well rhetorical boy! The species traits that are found in track impressions as dermatoglyphics, found in examples across States and over a period of decades... And the uniform morphological traits across hair samples that account for what is described as a "wild human"... That have sequenced as having the same DNA as us. Not to mention the skulls of offspring of alleged Yeti that possess ancient morphology, yet have tested again as having the same DNA as us.

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    10. the Gulf Coast Bigfoot Research Organization needing to parley with Mountain Monsters AIMS team leader TRAPPER and get some words of wisdom on hunting BIGFOOTS

      Delete
  2. the best way to defend yourself from bigfoot attacks is to see a good therapist and fix your mental disorders

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Says the person with a very real psychological diagnosis;
      https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/your-online-secrets/201409/internet-trolls-are-narcissists-psychopaths-and-sadists

      ... Unfortunately for you no therapy will make the boogeyman go away, but it might help you focus on things better suited to rediscovering some self esteem.

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    2. I just bring my AK47 with 154 grain SP in 30 round mags for my SAFETY

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    3. And not some quack born-again therapist like Dr. Johnson.

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    4. ^^^BITTER AGAINST GOD BECASE OF MAMA'S DRINK'IN PROBLEM AND DAD POKIN HIM IN THE TATORHOLE!

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    5. ^^^ calls Dr. Johnson for "spiritual" advice and affairs of the heart.

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    6. U looking for Bigfoot in the bush U need to be packing heat for your SAFETY

      Delete
  3. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XM545XNyU-g

    55 minutes onwards

    todd disotell who tested sykes samples of zana and kwit states that they came back as modern humans, not bigfoots

    PJ BTFO

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. and 57 minutes onwards when asked what percentage would he give to bigfoots existing he says 0.0001%

      absolutely fu cking rekt

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    2. Your video was streamed in November 2013... A lot has happened since then;
      http://www.techtimes.com/articles/44347/20150406/dna-test-suggests-russian-apewoman-zana-was-not-human-and-yeti-may-not-be-a-myth.htm

      Yeti, just like Sasquatch are ancient humans that share our exact DNA. Sorry to p*ss on your parade... Oh, and when Disotell gets around to explaining away the existing evidence, let me know.

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    3. Ancient humans that share our exact DNA?

      Really?

      You do realize that those two things are mutually exclusive, right?

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    4. You do realise that there are fossil versions of us that have anatomical and morphological differences? And guess what about their DNA?

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    5. Bigfoot are a GRAY hybrid so the Bigfoot DNA will have human as well as a unknown element in it FIND the GARYs and you will find BIGFOOT

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    6. Their DNA is different too. That's how we can tell the degree of hybridization with subgroups like neanderthals and denisovans.

      You really should stop trying to talk about things you clearly don't understand.

      Delete
    7. Um... I'm not the one who hasn't heard of Cro-Magnon.

      (Pfffft!!!)

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    8. Really? That's your response? Seriously?

      You just made my point, and you are too ignorant to understand how.

      Delete
    9. (Whispers)

      Here we go, start with the basics;

      http://youtu.be/JXWx0MHQVO4

      Delete
  4. PAGING DR. JOHNSON - PAGING DR. MATTHEW JOHNSON:

    Your troll self-defense course you are instructing starts in 5 minutes. Tonight's topic is "Why are people so mean to me?". All participants are waiting and accounted for (your wife and 4 children). Thank you.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I'd be popping my pants if i ever got a bigfoot angry at me. They are many times stronger than humans . look at how strong a chimp is and they are not as big as humans so imagine something many times larger would probably tear you apart if given the chance. The best way to defend yourself is to have plenty of weapons handy otherwise good luck

    Joe

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  6. How do you stop a bigfoot from charging?

    Take away his credit card?

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  7. Hold-up your camera. The Bigfoot will instantly become blurry or disappear altogether.

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    Replies
    1. I hate to admit, that is funny haints

      Joe

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  8. The study gathered information about people's psychological traits called the Dark Tetrad. This is a group of four personality traits: narcissism (selfishness, obsessive self-interest, feelings of grandiosity and superiority), Machiavellianism (a belief that the ends justify the means), psychopathy (lack of empathy, low inhibitions, antisocial), and sadism (enjoyment of inflicting pain on others).

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    Replies
    1. Everyone in the study had close to normal scores on their personality tests—except for people who like to troll. The trolls had extremely high scores on all four Dark Tetrad traits. In fact, the scientists said " . . . the associations between sadism and [trolling] scores were so strong that it might be said that online trolls are prototypical everyday sadists."

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    2. ^^^blow it out your ass hippy

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  9. I would defend myself against a Bigfoot attack by whipping out my iPad and forcing it to watch "Cocktail" starring Tom Cruise.

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  10. Best way to defend yourself is to use a camera. It will become far away and very blurry.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Too late - haints beat you to that joke 10 hours ago.

      Delete