This is what the human race could look like in 3012


We will all look like this monster 1000 years from now. According to predictions by leading anatomical experts, everyone will be taller, have longer arms, longer fingernails and men will have smaller testiscles. Since computers will be doing all the thinking for us in the future, we'll also have smaller brains, and more wrinkles as a result of peering at our electronic devices.

In the year 3012, the Bigfoot species is discovered and will be living next to humans, watching ancient episodes of Monster Quest on their hydrogen-powered iPhones.

From The Sun:

EVOLUTION has changed our bodies and faces over thousands of years — and it’s still happening.

Here’s how leading anatomical experts predict our descendants will differ physically from us in 1,000 years from now.

- We’ll be TALLER at 6-7ft because of improved nutrition and medical science. Osteopath Garry Trainer, from north London, says: “The average American is about one inch taller than in 1960.”

- Our INTESTINES will get shorter so we don’t absorb as much fat and sugar — a natural way of avoiding obesity, says dentist Dr Philip Stemmer.

- If male fertility declines further, there will be SMALLER TESTICLES (tough luck, chaps).

- Our most used extremities will change dramatically. ARMS AND FINGERS get longer to reduce the need to reach too far and nerve endings in hands and fingers will increase because of the greater use of devices such as iPhones that need complex eye-hand coordination.

- We’ll have SMALLER BRAINS, maybe because so much memorising and thinking is done by our computers. “Science fiction images show humans of the future with huge brains but big brains are not necessarily the best,” says Chris Stringer, from the Natural History Museum.

- There will be LARGE EYES to compensate for smaller mouths. Cary Cooper, of Lancaster University, explains: “Communication will rely on facial expressions and eye movements.”

- Dentist Dr Stemmer also thinks there could be FEWER TEETH as softer food needs less chewing and biting. He says: “We could even get our nutrition from liquids or pills in the future, which could mean less teeth and receded jaws.”

- Expect people to have QUADRUPLE CHINS. “Our bodies were designed for eating less and using more energy than a modern lifestyle requires,” says Rajiv Grover, a consultant plastic surgeon.

We can expect other dramatic changes too.

- Everyone will have the same shape of NOSE because climate is having less influence on broad or narrow hooters thanks to air conditioning and central heating.

- Central heating and warm clothing means we’ll be LESS HAIRY but there’ll be more WRINKLES as a result of peering at our electronic devices.

We could end up with saggy turkey necks too because extra sun will cause loose skin and baggy eyelids. And there will be darker skin as people move around the planet and races mix.

Read more: www.thesun.co.uk

Comments

  1. Replies
    1. By the way, what does FB/FB have to say about this? They are the human evolution experts!
      burp
      sniff

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    2. Interesting. But I don't believe we will be peering at our electronic devices in 1000 years. I think they will be internalized well before that.

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  2. Is it wrong that i look like that now?

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    Replies
    1. That's what Jrefer's look like.

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    2. I think most of the JREF footers would admit that they follow Randi because of his gayness not his skepticism because they are all in fact closet bleevers of Bigfoot.

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    3. Yessss,you are correct sir!

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    4. Why don't you intellectual midgets come over to the JREF and make your case. Oh, that's right... you won't because you'll get owned on all accounts.

      Come show us JREF'rs how its done. I double dog dare you.

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    5. Sorry,not into vibrating butt plugs much less attending a ceremony called "The Changing of The Golden Vibrating Butt Plug of Skeptism" for your Queen Randi.

      Y'all some sick bastards I tell you what.
      Are you picked to do the changing?
      Before you slide in the new one do y'all lube it up or go straight up cowboy on his taterhole?

      I heard Stank Ape has been picked as 'THE CHOSEN ONE' this week to do the changing,any truth to that?

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    6. That's' funny as shit!!!!
      Lmao....

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    7. it is true.i have been chosen to do the changing of the butt plug because i just joined the ranks of my fellow butt pluggers.at first i was "SKEPTICAL" if it was just a rumor about the changing.but i am so excited and honored to do my duty as a changer.you have to earn your stripes and by gosh i will do what i have to do to fit in since nobody likes me.maybe they will accept me with open butt cheeks.thank you tontar for being my tutor,it really helped me the other night when we took turns changing out each others butt plugs.it was a beautiful thing that i will never forget.and no,we don't use lube,it is straight up cowboy!YEE HAW!!!


      its on like donkey kong.

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    8. Awww ya'll are scurd. Poor little footers scurd of getting owned at the JREF. Not surprised.

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    9. ^^^Tickles his butt buddies taterhole with a feather.

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    10. Dude, it's not wrong, you are just way ahead of the curve!

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    11. Herr Derr dreaming of feathers, taterhole and Cutino.

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  3. First! . . . on a sadder note, this site is quickly becoming a laughing-stock. Come on Shawn!

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  4. It was in The Sun. Must be true then...

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  5. I love where "Sun" is coming out in the pic!!!!

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  6. This is the future of humankind: http://youtu.be/icmRCixQrx8

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  7. LMFAO! that would be funny if evolution really existed, but it's just a theory. Humans have looked the same as far as recorded history, which is thousands of years.

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    1. WOW! Let me guess, you gave up on mainstream science when mainstream science gave up on common sense.

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    2. Yeah because everyone you see is me, right?

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    3. Why dont you go ahead and prove evolution is bullshit and get it peer reviewed and collect your nobel prize.

      :)

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    4. Prove that something that was never proven is B.S.? Do not confuse me with someone who does not think evolution is a possibility. I think it is a possibility. My problem is that this is ALL it is. A possibility, not a proven fact.

      This quote says it all:

      " There is an exception to the peer review system. That exception is in sciences where no answer is possible or available. In a science such as evolution, the only thing its scientists and scientific writers can do is make information up; use their imagination. They present this imaginary information as if it isn’t made up; as if it’s real science. Such is the case with evolution’s peer reviewed papers. There is no answer as to how life came to be; or living cells; or any biological systems; not even bird nests. But evolution’s paper writers go on as if they do have the answer. Evolution science writers write paper after paper. They are peer reviewed and passed. Many peer reviewers are paper writers themselves. They pass one imaginary paper in hopes that their imaginary paper will be passed. One paper piles on top of another, until there is an immense pile of papers. For over one hundred and fifty years evolution’s papers have been stacking up. The writing, even though it is mostly imagination, is then quoted as if it’s real evidence." (http://evillusion.wordpress.com/mountains-of-peer-reveiwed-papers/)

      "Evolution" is not science, it is just as much religion as ID or Creationism. The only difference is that these are the guys calling the shots in modern academics. They are only searching for what fits into their belief and paying no attention findings that do not. Actually they attack findings that do not. There is no common sense in this. How about the huge gap between Anthropology and Archaeology that no one seems to notice? They are so sure that no Homo-Sapiens-Sapiens existed in Europe during the Ice Age because we found no bodies. Yet at the same time, here in America we date Clovis tools six thousand years prior to the oldest Body ever found in America.. Where are the 20,000 year old bodies that match the tools?

      So they expect to tell me human origins as if they know and not discuss why Anthropological and Archeological evidence does not match?.. No thank you.

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    5. Only the dummy JREF'ers bleeve in evolution. It's called the theory of evolution for a reason.

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    6. Evolution is a theory, but that is not a valid reason to say it doesn't exist. Explain the Galapagos island animals if you think evolution doesn't happen. Even if you believe in a creator, evolution has been observed happening in animals. Read a book!

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    7. Might I remind you all, creation is a theory, too. Just not a very scientific one.

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    8. Might I remind you to pick up yo mama after the gang bang!
      SNAP!!

      PS.You might want to bring her another wheel chair cause we broke the one she was in,sorry.

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    9. Galapagos has absolutely nothing to do with one thing becoming another. "Adaptation" is not "Evolution". A Sea Iguana is still an Iguana.

      I have no problem with beneficial mutations. That is plainly evident. But one class becoming another is where I draw the line. "Transitional fossils"... Name ONE! just one. There is no fossil evidence for anything becoming anything else. Where did a giraffe become a horse? or a monkey become an ape and an ape become a human?

      Even the subtle changes from one pre-human to another that they try to make an evolutionary case for could just as easily been two ethnic groups of the same species. Otherwise, you might as well categorize Negroids and Caucasoids as two separate species. Of coarse in doing so you open that other can of worms and pretty much call all black people inferior to whites, since according to Evolution White Europeans evolved from black Africans.

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    10. OK Tzieth, maybe you do have a clue after all.

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    11. all fossils are transitional fossils Tzieth you ignorant asswipe.

      If you understood wtf you were talking about maybe everyone with half a brain wouldn't find you such a tremendous boob.


      But you don't. I guess it's just easier to point and go "jesus did it daddy!"

      go dance with a snake or drink poison or wtvr it is you people do for fun

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    12. Yeah I saw that ignorant comment the last time you made it Stank. NO fossil is transitional.

      But then again you have made my case. You resort to personal attacks just as you always do when your backed into a corner. But funny how you attack religion lol. An Invisible man in the sky is no different from your non-existent transitional fossils.

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  8. what you can count on is in 3012 bigfoot will still not be found but the lunatic fringe bleevers will still be there

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    Replies
    1. So will the closet bleevers like you douche.

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    2. ^ you seem to have some strange fantasy that bigfoot is so real that you cant accept the fact that people dont believe in it.

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    3. Umm no. You are one of about 10 morons on the whole planet that professes to be obsessed with a mythical creature. As pointed out adults usually find no interest in a creature they're convinced does not exist. You are either a simpleton of epic proportions or are interested because you still think there's a possibility Bigfoot exists but I'll bet on the former.

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    4. You said the magic words, they are "convinced it does not exist." That says more about our culture and media (and government manipulation of same?) than it does bigfoot, however. Only a true fool would flat-out declare bigfoot does NOT exist, since one could turn up tomorrow. Certainly the reports of it being seen are there, for thousands of years, in fact. To deny that as a possibility is idiocy, not smarts.

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  9. Thats what we all will look like if we all smoke crack for the next 1K years

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  10. That is a spitting image of Dick Ryder!
    Look at the eyes.
    No dick,bald and a small ass brain!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Damn that's freaky..we must stop this by forming a giant gay ball! who's with me...?

    ReplyDelete
  12. Human race will die out not because of disease , but knowbody wants to have sex with anything that looks like that. Eeeeww!

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    Replies
    1. Don't worry, it refers only to people who have facebook accounts.

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  13. The small brain part must be true, because here we are in 2012 and some people still believe in a 8 foot tall 800 pound ape living in the north american forests.

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    Replies
    1. You shouldn't be so hard on yourself.

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    2. Worse still, look how many haven't shaken the outdated notion of there being a "God" yet. Even sadder than believing an unknown but often glimpsed animal may really exist in the deep woods. After all, we don't even have any blurry photos or footprints to suggest God is real, do we?

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    3. We have the world for proof of God. That's all you need. Bigfoot is a shit sandwich which is only eaten by brain-dead degenerates like you.

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  14. Total Bullshit....people in America aren't getting taller they are getting wider..take a look around people...too much fast food and junk food.

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    Replies
    1. Yep, we will be so fat in America that those thin legs would never support us. Then again, we may just be carted around in some kind of moving chairs, or live out our pathetic lives in bed.

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    2. One can only wish...I'm going on a cheeseburger run...SUPER SIZE ME !!!

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    3. Where's McCheeser when you need him!

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  15. What a bunch of malarkey... ( Biden told me to say that...

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    Replies
    1. Jeff Dunhams' Walter looks just like Biden.

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    2. Spitten image and has the brain of a dummy too!

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    3. Actually in reality it kind of reminds me more of Jimmy Carter

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  16. This is the most absolute dumbest thing I've ever read, anywhere. Its so far fetch and out in left field that it isn't even remotely possible to look like that in 5,000 years, let alone 1,000.

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    Replies
    1. Really, you ever seen Henry May when he was thin? Well now you have.

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  17. There will still be outsiders that live outside the boundaries and don't take the soma. If you wander into these camps, be careful o' my brothers.

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  18. denying evolution now?sad.you are sasquatch,you do know that,don't you tzieth.it was written in a book by men,just like your bible,therefore it must be true.ta da!

    ReplyDelete

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