May Is The Start Of Skunk Ape Mating Season? We Hope Tim Fasano Can Help Us With This One
Did you know that the month of May is Skunk Ape mating season?
According to an article from Flash News, Dave Shealy, an RV park owner in Florida, is a self professed "leading researcher" of the Skunk Ape and he believes that May is the start of Skunk Ape mating season. Shealy said there are seven to nine Skunk Apes currently living in the Everglades. He suggested that hikers, especially women in the Everglades should be careful because the male apes can smell the scent of menstruation.
"They’re also aroused by used lingerie, so female campers shouldn’t hang their panties out to dry," Shealy warned.
From Flash News:
Published: Thursday, May 13, 2010 17:10 GMT
OCHOPEE, Fla. (Wireless Flash - FlashNews) – Bigfoot mating season is underway in the Florida Everglades and the furry, horny creature is out for blood.
Dave Shealy, an RV park owner in Ochopee, Florida, is the leading researcher of the Skunk Ape, Bigfoot’s “smaller, smellier cousin.”
He says there are seven to nine Skunk Apes currently living in the Everglades and right now is the best time to spot one because it’s their mating season.
Lately, he’s heard lots of campers report strange sounds coming from the swamps. He figures it’s the Skunk Ape’s mating call, which sounds like a low-pitched dove cooing.
Though Skunk Apes are generally shy, Shealy says women on their periods should be careful when hiking the area because the cryptoids are attracted to the scent of menstruation.
They’re also aroused by used lingerie, so female campers shouldn’t hang their panties out to dry because, in his words, “That’s like raising a flag and inviting them in.”
BOM CHICKA WAH WAH
ReplyDeleteDUM DITTA DOOOO
ReplyDelete7-9 living in Florida? There's got to be more than that.
ReplyDeleteActually... It's closer to 0
DeleteOne then... that hardly makes a breeding population. I like your comments 451, they really make you think.
DeleteWhy would the phlegm hacker be an expert?
ReplyDeleteare you sure we shouldnt change the name to skank ape. only a skank would hang up dirty, smelly panties to dry.
ReplyDeleteyes skank ape
DeleteAre you sure it wasn't during Spring Break?
ReplyDeleteAre you sure it wasn't during Spring Break?
ReplyDeleteHelp! I'm Naked and I have all this Beer!
ReplyDeleteOnce upon a time in the land of squatch, their lived 3 hoaxers: rick dyer, tim fatsino, and snowpacker prime. After a hard days work at the unemployment office they came home to find someone asleep in their beds. So the first one in, snowpacker cried, rick that kinda looks like you. The second hoaxer in, tim fatsino, cried,, oh my broski hes holding fatback, yummm. And the last one in, rick dyer, cried, oh me oh my, its my gay ass brother asleep in our beds. What shall we do. As he looked around he saw snowpacker stroking his scumstash, and fatsino licking his lips. And with that rick dyer proclaimed, oh hell lets jump in with him. And they lived on welfare forever after. the end
ReplyDeleteOnce upon a time in the land of squatch, their lived 3 hoaxers: rick dyer, tim fatsino, and snowpacker prime. After a hard days work at the unemployment office they came home to find someone asleep in their beds. So the first one in, snowpacker cried, rick that kinda looks like you. The second hoaxer in, tim fatsino, cried,, oh my broski hes holding fatback, yummm. And the last one in, rick dyer, cried, oh me oh my, its my gay ass brother asleep in our beds. What shall we do. As he looked around he saw snowpacker stroking his scumstash, and fatsino licking his lips. And with that rick dyer proclaimed, oh hell lets jump in with him. And they lived on welfare forever after. the end
ReplyDeleteI love Tim Fasano more than life itself.
ReplyDeleteTim can be the swamp ape fluffer.
ReplyDeleteI differ with the FL. researcher and his statement to when BF is in breeding season. I don't think it is May at all. I think it is August! You see, I'm a researcher with a high school diploma and a tour of duty as a mechanic in the Air Force - I know stuff damn it! I have been learnin' these critters for two decades now! They come around my trailer park here close to Gainsville, Fl. Yes it's true they like men-strating women smells but really what those critters like is an actual romp with own kind of folk. I seen 'em! May- no way. August I say. Or mayber, October. Hell, Even December is good for 'em if the weather is fine outside. I know!
ReplyDeletewhy do i get a strong sense this guy is describing himself? how much you want to bet youd find a few duffel bags worth of stolen womens underwear under his bed.
ReplyDelete" Though Skunk Apes are generally shy, Shealy says women on their periods should be careful when hiking the area because the cryptoids are attracted to the scent of menstruation.
ReplyDeleteThey’re also aroused by used lingerie, so female campers shouldn’t hang their panties out to dry because, in his words, “That’s like raising a flag and inviting them in.”
Jesus Christ, what a psychopath
Female hikers are advised to stay off Glacier Nat'l Park backtrails when they are on their periods. Grizzlies like dem smells, too. No mention of undie handling, however.
DeleteIf i lived in FL i def wouldnt camp at his park, he sounds like a loony bird to me.
DeleteDid you know bigfoot does not exist?
ReplyDeleteNeither dose this blog, its all in your head man!
DeleteSend away for panties from Japanese schoolgirl, wrap them around a twinkie, tie to tree with a slice of bacon, set up trail cam....what else am I missing?
ReplyDeletedont use beef that is people food use venison.lol
DeleteHonestly I think the lingerie is a little much but I have recently been using my wife and sister to draw them in and it has worked 2 out of 3 times. Im not in the everglades but I think he may be right.
ReplyDeleteUh oh, Tim F. had better look out. Apparently the skunk-ape can smell the used panties he buys online and wears in the field.
ReplyDeleteWOW! really? really? really? really?
ReplyDeleteand why do people think BF Believers
are psychos?
This guy right here.