Thursday, April 13, 2017

Bigfoot Lake Hunting Season Begins in Ohio


Tim Stover hits the lake with his personal watercraft, searching for signs of bigfoot in areas most never venture to.

5 comments:

  1. RIP John Veils

    Hard drivin man

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    1. Hard drinking man as well.

      I well remember the night Ole Johnny and I met up at a local dive bar to go over our research. Well Ole Johnny started right in with a pitcher or beer and 5 shots of Jack Daniels. A few hours go by and I am just staggering while he seems no worse for the wear. As the evening drew to a close Ole Johnny leaned in real close and said "lets go hogging". Being very drunk I thought he said "lets go squaching".

      Now I am always up for squaching so readily agreed. We leave,get in his truck and drive down the road. Next thing I know we are at a trailer home in the middle of nowhere. Ole Johnny cracks a grin and says "I hope you brought protection because she is a double bagger. Suddenly the door to the trailer flies open. From inside a woman's voice telling us to come on in.

      We walk in and are greeted with a sight so horrifying it gives me chills to recount it. Amidst to filthy and empty PBR cans I see an obese,greasy,smelly naked woman spread eagle on what was once a sofa. Putting out her cigarette she looks up at me and says "hi there honey pie my name is chick chick...you ready to take a ride?". She then laughed with a cackle so evil and vile it caused me to flee in terror into the night.

      In my panic I ran head on into a tree and knocked myself out. I awoke hours later outside the trailer. Ole Johnny and his truck were long gone. As were my pants. The stench that wafted up from my groin made me vomit..as did seeing the blood stains down there. Then I heard that cackle again followed by "kids git out here your new daddy is awake". I took off running down the road and never looked back.

      Goodspeed Ole Johnny.

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  2. There's a bigfoot lake hunting season in Ohio?

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    Replies
    1. Maybe someone should tell Stover about it.

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