Beachgoers Beware: Dolphins with guns & knives have escaped from secret secure military facility [Video]


This is a nightmare for beachgoers everywhere: It's bad enough we're training dolphins to kill with guns and knives -- we've now misplaced a couple of them. To be blunt... they've escaped from a secure facility and we (The Ukrainians) have no idea where they are. All the messy details are below in Michael Merchant's new video:

Comments

  1. Could it be?! Am I really first!?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Fool!!! Return to the abyss of non-first squatch blog trollers!!

      Delete
  2. Aww, man! Nevermind. Those dolphins are proof that a 10 foot ape is roaming North American forests

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree. Bigfoot is real, because Dolphins have guns. Period.

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    2. There really isn't a counterpoint to that.

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    3. Bigfoot is real. That was easy.

      Delete
    4. Dolphins and guns dolphins and guuuuuns.
      It's a wicked world that we live in it's cool and I'm forgivin it's a wicked world that we live in it's cool and I'm forgivin watch me now

      The transplants dolphins and guns
      Lol

      Delete
  3. Deep blue sea- part 2! Revenge of the bottlenose!!

    These dolphins are out to right some wrongs! They never got over not being picked to kill Samuel L. Jackson in a movie. They're seek vengeance and justice against all those who chose sharks to be the genius killers after LL Cool J and his parrot. But this time, no one lives!


    Smashy76

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Coming soon to a beach near you. Just in time for summer.

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    2. Someone will make this into a horror flick.

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  4. Replies
    1. Fuq you cow!!!! Fuq you chicken!!!!!
      Best episode ever

      Delete
  5. Ha!!! 1973's 'Day of the Dolphin" comes true! Next up, "Legend of Boggy Creek". I smell that crow cooking in the oven; gonna ram it down the troll skeptics throats.....bastards. Finally, after 41 years....

    ReplyDelete
  6. Who thought it was a good idea to give Dolphins guns?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The U.S. did it too, they just denied it.

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    2. And the Russians are denying they lost 3 killer dolphins too.

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    3. Did they lose them, or not?

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    4. We can't find 3 killer dolphines? WTF?

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    5. And well trained. Dolphin Borne style.

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    6. Do not i repeat do not corner them we have reason to believe they have PTSD from the sandbox and why we believe they ultimately went AWOL

      Delete
  7. Replies
    1. Where are the "Highlands"?

      Delete
    2. Drink the Stout, pass the football.

      Delete
    3. When you hear the footfall...you know the Ogre is right on top of ya.

      Delete
    4. This IS a Blog about Bigfoots.

      Delete
    5. You are right sir, it is.

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    6. Idiots, they're not a real animal.

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    7. They are real. Furry man apes.

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    8. Bigfoot is not a dump Ape.

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    9. They are beautiful peaceful people. And if you mess with them they will tear you limb from limb

      That's all

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    10. Ogres only play college ball with the pi

      Delete
  8. They let them loose on purpose because they have discovered that megalodon exists and they have sent them down 10000 feet to the Pacific ridge to kill the big bad megalodon. No more great whites either. Killer dolphins are now protecting us from sea monsters.

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  9. If the Dolphins don't have laser beams attached to their heads, it's not worth discussing.

    Guns don't kill Ukrainians
    -Dolphins with guns grafted to their fins Do!

    ReplyDelete
  10. I've heard this rumor before, last time I heard about this was in Guam and that the Marines were training dolphins to kill. But then again it was my mom who told me and she is by far one of the biggest liars I know. If Dolphins are smart at all, they wouldn't go anywhere near guns or weapons. They probably just wanted to go home.

    ReplyDelete

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